When we talk about professional development it’s not uncommon for us to use the terms coaching and mentoring interchangeably. When we’re mentoring someone it’s true we might sometimes provide them with coaching. Similarly, as a coach we might occasionally provide advice based on our own experiences. It’s no wonder then that we can get them confused. However there are distinct differences between the two and it’s important to understand them. When done correctly coaching can be a very effective leadership tool for improving an employee’s problem solving skills and to instill a greater sense of ownership when it comes to executing tasks.
The problem is, however, that leadership development programs tend to focus much more on developing mentoring skills and very little on developing coaching skills. Or worse still, neither of the approaches are sufficiently covered at all. When the actions of leaders, even unintentionally, encourage people to always ask for help rather than find the solution themselves, we are risking the productiveness, effectiveness, and creativeness of our teams.
There needs to be a more intensive focus on developing the coaching skills of leaders in our organizations. In doing so we can help to ensure mentoring and coaching approaches are applied appropriately and specific for the situation. In order to further that effort, let’s explore the differences between the two approaches, when you might use each of them, and a simple technique to use for coaching.
First, what is mentoring?
Wikipedia puts it pretty well and defines mentorship as: “a relationship in which a more experienced or more knowledgeable person helps to guide a less experienced or less knowledgeable person.”
Essentially there are two main ingredients in mentorship:
- One person is more experienced than the other in something and;
- The more experienced person helps transfer their knowledge to the less experienced person.
Despite how mentor relationships are commonly portrayed, being a mentor doesn’t mean you need to be senior to the person you’re mentoring. In fact, reverse mentoring is being successfully used in a number of organizations to establish learning relationships between younger employees and senior leaders.
Mentoring is a particularly effective way of supporting people with complex problems when you’ve been there before. Generally speaking you’re helping the other person to avoid the pitfalls and setbacks that you may have faced when you went through a related experience. Mentorship is an excellent method for grooming future leaders and for helping others to navigate challenging situations.
It’s an oversimplification, but you can think of mentoring as ‘giving the answer by sharing your experience’.
Okay, so what is coaching?
Coaching, on the other hand, can be defined as: “a form of development in which a person called a coach supports a learner or client in achieving a specific personal or professional goal by providing training and guidance.”
The key difference with coaching when compared to mentorship is that you are not providing an answer at all. You certainly don’t need to be more knowledgeable than the other person. Fundamentally, you’re ‘helping the other person to find the answer within themselves’.
You can think of coaching like fishing. You’re the fisherman, your rod is the coaching technique, the water is the person being coached, and the fish are all of the challenges, opportunities, and actions that you help bring out! In a mentoring relationship, you’re the one putting the fish into the water!
That’s a very important distinction!
It’s important because when we do it correctly, and in the right situations, we get really amazing results. What better way to generate buy-in for an action than if your employee defines it herself? Through coaching, people develop a stronger sense of self-awareness and openness toward learning and personal development. By empowering people to explore their own ideas on how to solve a challenge they’re facing, you’ll foster higher levels of engagement and employee satisfaction.
So, how do you coach someone?
There’s a great deal of information available in books and online regarding coaching. Each one describing various models, frameworks, and providing advice for coaching individuals in organizations. There’s no one size fits all approach but one model that gets us pretty close is named ‘GROW‘.
Even with this model there are a few ways it can be defined, but the version I was taught is simple, straight-forward, and easy to remember, so that’s the one I’ll share.
G: Goal
Start the conversation by first understanding what your employee’s objective or goal is. Where do they want to be? Where are they now and what do they want to achieve? Only by first defining the start and end point can we begin to explore the current challenges and future actions to bring them from point A to point B.
R: Roadblocks
Once the goal is well defined, begin to explore what’s currently stopping your employee from achieving their objectives. This part is often the hardest since it’s not always clear what the real challenges are. Ask open ended questions and remain curious about the answers to build dialogue. Further reading on great questions to ask during a coaching session can be found here. When it seems like you’ve identified all of the roadblocks, ask the person: “anything else?”. This simple prompt can sometimes help people to look beyond the most obvious challenges and encourage them to think more deeply about what is preventing them from moving forward.
Remember, you’re not interrogating someone! Make sure to keep the dialogue flowing as you would in a regular conversation.
O: Options
Taking each one of the identified roadblocks, explore what can be done to address them. Continue to use open ended questions and prompts such as “what else?” and “anything more?” to ensure solutions are being fully explored. Importantly, avoid the urge to offer an answer! As tempting as it might be to put in your two cents worth, it defeats the purpose completely. Remain supportive, inquisitive, and encouraging.
W: Willingness
Finally, wrap up your coaching session with a commitment. Ask for the willingness of your employee to follow through on the identified solutions. Turn the solutions into actions by establishing clear deadlines and accountability. There may be tasks that require the support of others. This is perfectly fine but make sure your employee knows they’re in the driving seat!
Bringing it all together
Mentoring has an important place inside our organizations. Good leaders are able to share their experience openly and develop others by providing perspective and practical advice. Great leaders, on the other hand, have the ability to distinguish when a situation calls for mentoring or coaching, as well as the capability to provide the coaching effectively. When coaching is done right, the potential benefits for individuals and organizations are great.
Employee’s expectations toward leaders are changing. Leaders need to be less directive and more consultative. As workforce demographics continue to shift it is necessary for organizations to keep pace, adapt where required, and ensure they place as much importance on developing coaching skills with their leaders as they do with mentoring skills. To put it simply: we need more coaches!
